there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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