Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
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