so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
