"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
