So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize