When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
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