Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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