and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
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my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
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It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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