wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
