just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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