Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere