How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
