I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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