never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Green mimosas i think yes
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
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