I think scott just propositioned me for sex
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Randomize
