Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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