I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
