I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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