Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
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