I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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