He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize