I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize
