Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
