were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Randomize