Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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