All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
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