I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I need to calm my uterus...
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
