Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I deserve to be covered in dicks
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize