don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
