So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Randomize
