Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
