he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Go christen that room with your naked body.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
