Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
