omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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