I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
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