he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
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