Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
