are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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