This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize