He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
