I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
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