Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
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