Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
you had me at cake vodka
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Randomize
