Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
No subtext here. People are naked.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
