Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
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