so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Randomize
