Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Randomize
