Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Randomize
