But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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