Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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