your thong is hanging out like whoa
Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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